So I'm thinkin'...
... I'm not really the best mom around. I know, you are all going "what are you talking about? you're great with kids, you love kids!" Yes, I know. This is precisely what makes me not the best mom. Let me give you some examples.
Kayla is told to clean her room. She says she would rather dance for a while first. Now, the correct good mom response would obviously be "No, hon, clean your room and THEN we dance." But, like Ellen, I think dancing is necessary every day, and for crying out loud, I would rather dance than stand in Kayla's room making sure she cleans it properly, so dancing it is. Does the room ever get clean? Yep, while she is in the bath I clean it for her. What does she learn from this? 1. If I ask to dance, I can get out of anything, cause mommy likes to dance. 2. If I can keep from cleaning my room until bathtime, mommy will do it for me. She also learns some groovy 80's dance moves, and some slammin' songs, and how to work Fred through the stereo, but I' not sure any of that counts as good parenting.
Charlie is told that it's time for dinner, and therefore he must turn off the Xbox. His reply is that he just wants to finish this level he is on. This makes perfect sense to me, I know you can't save your game on some of these until the end of a level, so OK. Next thing you know, he can't get the level finished and wants me to help him. Fine, whatever gets it done so we can eat, right? Except... I like to play the video games too, and this almost always ends with him and me playing some two player thing for half an hour while Kayla is wondering what happened to dinner. What does Charlie learn from this? 1. If I want mommy to come play video games, I should pretend to need her help. 2. Even mommy would rather play xbox than eat whatever crap she's fixed for us tonight, so it must be bad. Also, he gets some hand-eye coordination and knows how to defeat the evil Dr. Cortex, or gain kudos points by slamming his car into the other guy's - but again, not sure it counts as good parenting.
Oh, another thing - if my kids ever tell me that they "need to tell me something" or that they "just want to lay with me", guaranteed they are not having to go lay in their own beds. I can talk 4 year old to Kayla for hours, because I just love the things she says. And if Charlie says he wants to lay with me... well, let's just say he's not your snuggliest kid and I'll take it wherever I can get it. Of course they know this. So half the time Todd comes home from dealing poker and finds me on the couch, Charlie at one end, Kayla in my lap talking about something, and gets upset because it's like 1130 and they aren't in bed. I know, I know. But dang, they are so cute. And so fun. What's a mom to do?
I'm sure in my kid's eyes I am like THE best mom ever. I play with them when I shouldn't, I let them stay up when I shouldn't, they don't have a whole lot of chores, and we really do have a marvelous time most days. Not to mention when someone says "Where should we go on vacation?" I am the first one to say "Disneyland." But I guess I should really make them follow some rules or something. It's not gonna be easy, because among other things, I think "questions authority" is a GOOD thing to see on your report card, and my kids can be both devious and painfully logical when debating things, but it needs to be done, and it's not fair of me to make Todd be the bad guy all the time.
But anyways, we started this rule thing last night, when Todd was here and not at work. Wednesday's new rule: Eating is only for the kitchen. I took it a step further and actually turned off the TV's too - I'm not sure Todd was thrilled with that, but it did keep the kids in their seats and not bouncing up to see what they were missing on American Idol. Charlie was not a happy guy. He kept telling us we were disabling the rules of the house, and that he was NOT taking it well. Also that we were limiting him. Kayla kept saying she would be careful with her food in the living room, until the TV went off, then she didn't care anyway. Today's new rule will be that without question ALL of school has to be done before there are any video games. We will still take breaks, but honestly, once he starts with the xbox it is a pain in the ass to get him to stop and do school again, so he can watch TV or play computer or read or something during break time. Kayla's new rule for the day will be that (sad as it is) there is no dancing unless the room is clean.
In other news... well, there isn't much really. I am sick, I have Todd's cold. With a fever, so I get that cool chills morphing into a cold sweat kind of thing, so not only am I pale as death but I smell funny too. Everytime I get up I feel like pure crap, so I'm just not getting up much, so my house is kind of a disaster. I'm going to attempt to keep it in some sort of order today, at least good enough that we wouldn't get thrown out if the health department stopped by. Kerri has just crowned me Queen of the Dorks, and I would like to thank all the little dorks out there for your votes, I wouldn't be here without all of you. ;) Looking forward to Kayla's birthday this weekend, we are going to Build-A-Bear and she's going to the beauty shop with Grandma. Should be fun. And that's it.
Disclaimer - this entire thing was typed while I was in a nyquil induced fog. If there are typos or it simply makes no sense, it's cause I am drugged.
Kayla is told to clean her room. She says she would rather dance for a while first. Now, the correct good mom response would obviously be "No, hon, clean your room and THEN we dance." But, like Ellen, I think dancing is necessary every day, and for crying out loud, I would rather dance than stand in Kayla's room making sure she cleans it properly, so dancing it is. Does the room ever get clean? Yep, while she is in the bath I clean it for her. What does she learn from this? 1. If I ask to dance, I can get out of anything, cause mommy likes to dance. 2. If I can keep from cleaning my room until bathtime, mommy will do it for me. She also learns some groovy 80's dance moves, and some slammin' songs, and how to work Fred through the stereo, but I' not sure any of that counts as good parenting.
Charlie is told that it's time for dinner, and therefore he must turn off the Xbox. His reply is that he just wants to finish this level he is on. This makes perfect sense to me, I know you can't save your game on some of these until the end of a level, so OK. Next thing you know, he can't get the level finished and wants me to help him. Fine, whatever gets it done so we can eat, right? Except... I like to play the video games too, and this almost always ends with him and me playing some two player thing for half an hour while Kayla is wondering what happened to dinner. What does Charlie learn from this? 1. If I want mommy to come play video games, I should pretend to need her help. 2. Even mommy would rather play xbox than eat whatever crap she's fixed for us tonight, so it must be bad. Also, he gets some hand-eye coordination and knows how to defeat the evil Dr. Cortex, or gain kudos points by slamming his car into the other guy's - but again, not sure it counts as good parenting.
Oh, another thing - if my kids ever tell me that they "need to tell me something" or that they "just want to lay with me", guaranteed they are not having to go lay in their own beds. I can talk 4 year old to Kayla for hours, because I just love the things she says. And if Charlie says he wants to lay with me... well, let's just say he's not your snuggliest kid and I'll take it wherever I can get it. Of course they know this. So half the time Todd comes home from dealing poker and finds me on the couch, Charlie at one end, Kayla in my lap talking about something, and gets upset because it's like 1130 and they aren't in bed. I know, I know. But dang, they are so cute. And so fun. What's a mom to do?
I'm sure in my kid's eyes I am like THE best mom ever. I play with them when I shouldn't, I let them stay up when I shouldn't, they don't have a whole lot of chores, and we really do have a marvelous time most days. Not to mention when someone says "Where should we go on vacation?" I am the first one to say "Disneyland." But I guess I should really make them follow some rules or something. It's not gonna be easy, because among other things, I think "questions authority" is a GOOD thing to see on your report card, and my kids can be both devious and painfully logical when debating things, but it needs to be done, and it's not fair of me to make Todd be the bad guy all the time.
But anyways, we started this rule thing last night, when Todd was here and not at work. Wednesday's new rule: Eating is only for the kitchen. I took it a step further and actually turned off the TV's too - I'm not sure Todd was thrilled with that, but it did keep the kids in their seats and not bouncing up to see what they were missing on American Idol. Charlie was not a happy guy. He kept telling us we were disabling the rules of the house, and that he was NOT taking it well. Also that we were limiting him. Kayla kept saying she would be careful with her food in the living room, until the TV went off, then she didn't care anyway. Today's new rule will be that without question ALL of school has to be done before there are any video games. We will still take breaks, but honestly, once he starts with the xbox it is a pain in the ass to get him to stop and do school again, so he can watch TV or play computer or read or something during break time. Kayla's new rule for the day will be that (sad as it is) there is no dancing unless the room is clean.
In other news... well, there isn't much really. I am sick, I have Todd's cold. With a fever, so I get that cool chills morphing into a cold sweat kind of thing, so not only am I pale as death but I smell funny too. Everytime I get up I feel like pure crap, so I'm just not getting up much, so my house is kind of a disaster. I'm going to attempt to keep it in some sort of order today, at least good enough that we wouldn't get thrown out if the health department stopped by. Kerri has just crowned me Queen of the Dorks, and I would like to thank all the little dorks out there for your votes, I wouldn't be here without all of you. ;) Looking forward to Kayla's birthday this weekend, we are going to Build-A-Bear and she's going to the beauty shop with Grandma. Should be fun. And that's it.
Disclaimer - this entire thing was typed while I was in a nyquil induced fog. If there are typos or it simply makes no sense, it's cause I am drugged.
posted by Holly at 10:01 AM
5 Comments:
Screw the rules! Lets dance! And eat at the coffee table in the living room!
Sorry you are not feeling well. Get better soon!!
gotta love kids who know how to work the system at such a young age. :)
hope you feel better Holly!!
So...thirty years from now, what will they remember?
You could have a pristine room, a set bedtime, rigid rules or you can dance...
I hope you dance!
When Hadley was a little baby a friend was over and Brian put her down (she was under 6 weeks and we were certain she'd melt if we put her out of our arms!). He commented that "We can't hold her all the time." And Tammy said, "Why not? What else have you got to do right now?" AND, so began my career as Queen Lazy Momma! So, dance away!!
Hope you are feeling better soon!!
You know, Dance. Just Dance. Rooms will keep getting messy.
Before you know it, Kayla will be 13 and wearing chains and thinking you're a dork who can't do anything right, let alone dance.
And yea, take Charlie's hugs when you can get them. You never know when that will happen.
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